


golden boy; tell me what it’s like to burn

by Forestgreengirl



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Violence, Introspection, Luke Castallen & Thalia Grace Are Best Friends, Luke Castellan Is A Mess, Luke Castellan Needs A Hug, annabeth chase needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:41:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24405982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Forestgreengirl/pseuds/Forestgreengirl
Summary: Luke Castellan hates the gods, hates them even more than he hates himself. He hates Kronos, and he hates that he’s letting his family be hurt like this. This was supposed to be a good thing; he’s not sure when it became so twisted.or(Luke’s introspection on being possessed by Kronos, and the final battle)
Relationships: Luke Castellan & Annabeth Chase, Luke Castellan & Annabeth Chase & Thalia Grace, Luke Castellan & Thalia Grace
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29





	golden boy; tell me what it’s like to burn

**Author's Note:**

> no copyright!

Kronos isn’t what Luke expected, not by a longshot. There was a major difference in the titan who whispered sweet promises in his ears at night, that watched his every move, and the titan that sits inside his bones, occupies a part of his head, leaving Luke burning from the inside out. 

Luke doesn’t control most of his body anymore, he spends most of his time thinking back on the past, eyes squeezed shut from what Kronos is making him do. He knows it must be done, the gods are  _ wrong,  _ its all corrupt and he wants to tear it apart by its roots. But Kronos doesn't care about who gets hurt and who survives, and Luke will never endorse the murder of his old campmates, his old friends. 

_ (“I can help you. Trust me.”) _

Wrestling control from Kronos, even just for a moment makes him feel like he’s burning from inside out. It leaves him disorientated, and cold and he can taste ash in his mouth for days afterwards. He ignores the guilt that threatens to swallow him whole whenever he sees Kronos use  _ his  _ body to destroy anybody who stands in his way, he ignores how he wants to empty his stomach when he sees the flash of fear-filled grey eyes when he turns. He ignores how the smell of pine still makes his breath catch. 

The longer the Titan occupies his body, he feels small parts of himself all away, merging with the rage and destruction of Kronos’s mind. It hurts so much, some day’s he doesn't know where Kronos ends and he begins; it becomes normal to feel gut-wrenching rage around him, the sticky feeling of blood on his hands becomes normal. 

But its fine, he’s dealing. This is what he has to do, this will fix things, he can make sure nobody else will ever have to suffer what he has. 

He thought the time before was hard, when Thalia was gone, and Grover was tearing himself apart in guilt, and it was just Luke and Annabeth, but thats nothing compared to this. At least before he still had his family; now he’s just alone. Alone on a ship, sharing consciousness with a mad Titan that doesn’t care about the casualties of achieving his goal. He can’t be upset, he did this to himself, trying to get revenge on something that won't ever even change. 

The only way to stop the gods is to tear them out by their roots. 

He finds himself missing Annabeth’s rambling about whatever new thing she learnt, and he misses Chirons fatherly presence, hell, he even finds himself missing sparring with Jackson. Most of all he misses Thalia, misses her like he's lost a limb; she was his best friend, the only person he could really trust for most of his life. 

_ (“Of course we’ll stay together! We’re family! Right?” _

_ “Of course.”)  _

He knows how much she would hate him for this, Thalia hated what the gods have done, and still continue to do, but was always too kind hearted, no amount of pretending would take away the fact that Thalia  _ liked  _ to do the right thing, Luke loves her, and he misses her, but he’s glad she’s not with him in this. 

Part of Luke wishes he could go back, could go back to when his mother was okay, and he was blissfully unaware of the gods, it was a simpler time, and it’s so much better then the ichor-stained soul that’s fighting for control in his own body. 

Luke doesn’t regret what he’s doing, not really, he regrets how many people are going to be hurt, and he regrets how much Thalia and Annabeth are going to  _ hate  _ him, but he doesn’t regret what he’s doing.

The gods need to pay, they need to pay for how many kids just feel unclaimed and unloved, and they need to pay for how many lives they’ve ruined. 

Kronos isn’t much better, his hands are still ones that want everything for  _ themselves _ , but most days his bitterness outweighs any regret he could have at choosing to help Kronos. 

_ (“Luke I can help you, please.” _

_ “I don’t need your help. This is what’s best.”) _

Luke watches as Kronos tears through his opponents without hesitation, he’s not ashamed to say that the broken sight of his friends' bodies makes him feel sick. 

He watches them fight, and beg, and snarl and he wishes he could tell them it would be okay, they won’t be the gods pets anymore; that’s a good thing. 

(He ignores the way his hands are shaking, clenching into the weapon tighter than what’s needed.)

Somewhere along the line, Kronos takes full control, that only becomes apparent as he goes from standing in chunks of broken metal, to standing in a fractured room. 

Luke isn’t sure whether Jackson looks more terrified or pissed; it’s probably safe to assume it’s a mix of them both. Grover looks terrified as usual, but it’s Annabeth that Luke really looks at; she looks terrified, and Luke wants to hurl at the fear being aimed at him. 

Annabeth doesn’t stop, she doesn’t just stay away from Kronos, and Luke can’t keep him at bay forever. Kronos swings his weapon, and Luke comes to the startling realisation that he’s going to kill her. 

Annabeth is on the ground in the next moment and-

_ “Family Luke. You promised.”  _

Luke feels like the wind has been knocked out of him, he hates the gods, he wants them  _ gone _ , but this is Annabeth, his little sister and he  _ promised  _ he would never hurt her. Everything around him feels like it’s hyper-focused, his mind only thinking of how to keep Annabeth alive. He’s not aware of the heat rushing through his body, making his hands shake by his sides. Kronos is getting stronger, he’s getting ready and Luke needs to stop him  _ now;  _ or he won’t have friends to hate him. 

He forms a plan, his resolve tightens.

He knows what he needs to do.

_ (“I’m sorry.”) _

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it! It’s my first Proper fic for pjo, unless you count the ones from when I was 10- also I love how my first written contribution to the fandom and it’s mf angst-  
> I love Luke as a character honestly, especially since he’s one of the most complicated antagonists. 
> 
> heres a pjo discord server if anyone wants to join!: https://discord.gg/ppC9Cj  
> come chat on tumblr! (@forestgreengirl and @pomegrantesandbones)


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